Saturday, January 9, 2016

From The Street To The Club Females Aren't Safe From Harassment

I have written quite a bit about male street harassment of females because it's a problem that needs to stay out front until it is resolved. I imagine it's quite scary for most women when strangers hurl sexual connotations at them and then double-down on the inappropriate behavior by throwing in degrading epithets. Women shouldn't have to be subjected to this.
"The only bitches I know have four legs and full bodied fur."

I recently attended a 30 + party at a fraternity hall. The age of the attendees were 40 and above. I'm told discouraging attendees younger than 30 from attending was supposed to guard against behavior like female harassment and violence.

Well, there was no violence, but the harassment was all over the place.

I was standing outside the building getting some fresh air and an earful of talk from a woman on how I had ignored her at the bar when another woman came out and stood beside me and started venting.

She said there was one guy who had been relentlessly pursuing her for a dance. He kept getting in her face even after she (falsely) claimed to be married. Women shouldn't have to lie to be left alone.

In between his advances, she said there were a couple of other guys that made crude remarks about her having a big ass and they wanted some of it.

Now mind you while this woman was talking to me one of the assholes that were giving her problems came out of the door and saw her standing next to me and started to say something. She pointed to me and said,

"This is my husband".  He shifted his demeanor to a light-hearted one and said something to the effect  "You have a lovely wife man". He kept moving.

This woman was conservatively dressed and appeared quite mild mannered. It's important to note this because some people are of the mind that some women dress to solicit sexual attention. This was not one of them.

This frustrated lady said she came out to listen to some music, have a few drinks, and play some board games with her friends. She like most women that came out that evening did not come out to be harrassed and threatened.

That lady and I talked further and she revealed a deeper darker story that harassment only amplified for her. But the assholes that berated her didn't know or care to know that. Those assholes also probably didn't care that they have mothers, sisters, grandmothers, wives, girlfriends, daughters, and aunts. I guess they wouldn't mind these women in their lives could be subjected to such demeaning and scary behavior from the members of the other gender who are supposed to be tasked with protecting against such things.

This particular lady's evening of harassment confirmed a disturbing reason why street harassment is still thriving. That reason is the men that should be teaching their sons and grandsons better are out here doing it themselves. That a huge ass problem.

I have written before and I'll write it again. To extinguish this social ill, men and women are going to have to start the derailment in their homes by teaching their boys and girls that this behavior is unacceptable.

We're going to have to instill in our children that women and girls are not sex objects. Oh with media and the music industry fighting us every turn, it's going to be one hell of an uphill battle but I  believe we can win it.

We are going to have to teach our young boys that you don't win the chase by offending and demeaning. We have to teach our young girls not to respond to demeaning and unacceptable behavior.

First and foremost,  however, we're going to have to stop doing it ourselves.

We, the folks the young look up to and mock are going to have to display to them what they should be doing and how they should be acting.

It's that simple.

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